Hard and Hurt

While I'm writing this entry....

I was in my lovely baby gorjes..parking behind Costa Rica Hotel, PD where I can clearly saw Bunga Kelana 4 from here...

I just sending back Dear to the jetty where his boat service will take him back to the ship...and I drove quickly to the hotel to make sure I can see him climbing the the ship to his workplace again...

And I dunno what is my feeling now...I tried not to cry in front of him but I cried while driving to see him here...

It was hard for me....to be apart again from him this time....its really hard....I dunno when I can see him again...touch his hand again... I dunno when again I can saw his face...giving fully attention to me when i  talk about my insecurity and uncertainties....*sigh*..and when he hold me told me whatever it is he always be with me....

Its really hard for me....how i wish i can be with him there...I can see his workplace..but I just cant be there with him....Its even hard when I saw him mengagahkan diri turun to meet me eventho his not feeling well....haishh....

How I wish I have extra kekuatan for this...

Please ya Allah...gave me strength to face all this...I need my fully strength now...

Papepun...I was glad and bersyukur...ditemukan dengan dan sempat bermesra dan berkasih sayang buat seketika...sebelum kami berdua pergi jauh.....

I'm going to fly this Monday and Bunga Kelana 4 akan ke Tambun, Indonesia sebelum bergerak pula ke Australia...Jauhnya kami terpaksa berpisah di saat2 saya sgt memerlukan sokongan dia...

Sabar lah hati..tenanglah jiwa....Ada hikmah di sebalik apa yang telah ditentukan Nya ini....Semoga ada manis di sebalik pahit yang sedang kami telan ini...

Doakan saya dan kami..agar terus kuat untuk menghadapi semua ini....